So yesterday Loveawake blog put up a post about what he calls The Worst Lie Too Many Men Believe. The post basically attempted to dispel the “myth” that any man can get any woman with the right approach. He called bullshit on that theory and I called bullshit on his calling bullshit. Never one to be thwarted by my irrefutable logic, I suspect that my homie remains unconvinced. So today’s post is dedicated to him and anyone who doesn’t believe that all women are susceptible to jedi mind tricks when they are executed properly; even if the man is a certified grade-A troll. Allow me to school you on the greatest #swindle known to man: the ol’ switcheroo. Ah, the switcheroo. Every woman I know has fallen for it and most of us can see it coming a mile away and yet we all keep falling for it and you know why? Because the shit works

The basic premise of the switcheroo is basically for a man to sweat a woman until she begins to sweat him (word to @emti’s mom). Since flattery – especially when it is consistent, extravagant, and largely undeserved - is a woman’s kryptonite, step one of the switcheroo is simply to gas up the head of your unsuspecting victim. Keep it asexual though – most women aren’t really all that flattered by the knowledge that you want to fuck her. Instead, find her weak spot and target it – her beauty, her brains, her intelligence, her class. Compare her favourably to women around her who are getting more attention. Whatever angle you decide to take, just keep aiming your blows at that tender spot. She may be resistant at first, maybe she’ll blow you off with a “boy please” or just roll her eyes and keep it moving. But that’s just because she’s afraid to believe that you mean what you’re saying. The more you do it – and the more sincerity you put behind it – the more she’ll like it. And from liking it, she’ll come to expect it, and from expecting it she’ll come to need it.

You know what comes next, right? Once she comes to need your flattery and attention, you simply withdraw it. Abruptly and nearly completely. If you started out greeting her with a “hey gorgeous”, start greeting her with a generic “what’s up”. If you used to compliment her on how well she coordinated her belt with her shoes, now you don’t even notice that shit. Whatever you were doing before to let her know you were interested, completely stop doing it. But don’t disappear from her life because that is a whole other #swindle. Be around as much as you were, just withdraw all the things you used to do to make her feel special. Without the sun of your ceaseless attention shining over her, your girl is going to feel lost in the darkness. And what does one do when one is suddenly plunged into blackness? Fumble blindly in the dark looking for the light. So your girl is going to start doing the most to get your attention back. If you were doing all the calling before, she’ll be doing it now. If you were laying the flattery on thick, she’ll be slathering it on with a putty knife now. She is going to try every feeble trick in her arsenal to get your attention back.

And there you have it. You who were once the ugly dude, the short dude, the broke dude, the fat dude who didn’t stand a chance are now THE dude that she has to have. Or so she thinks. The reality is that all she really wants is your attention; but since women don’t like to admit how much they need flattery, she’ll convince herself that you are the one for her and do everything she can to get you. You might know the truth, but you probably won’t care. Now let me just end this off by reminding you men that the switcheroo is a bitch-made move and in no way do I advocate executing it. If you have to go through all of this to get a girl to like you, you seriously need to step your entire life up. But the shit works if you do it properly and it really doesn’t matter where you and the object of your campaign reside on the ladder. But what do you guys think? Men have you ever executed the switcheroo? Do you believe that this tactic can work? Do you think a woman could do this to get a man’s attention? (She can’t – but that’s another post for another day). Ladies have you ever been switcheroo’d? Speak your piece in the comments.